My Family: an English essay by Mary Ellen Winchester-Novak
by SpeckleFish326
Summary: Hello, English teacher. My name is Mary Ellen, but everyone calls me by my initials. I am 14 years old. You asked me to write an essay about my family, probably because I only just came to this school and you thought it would be an easy A. Well, buckle up professor. My family is complicated. (Written by Dean and Castiel's daughter, cover image from Google Images.)


My Family, by Mary Ellen Winchester-Novak

Hello, English teacher whose name I have already forgotten. My name is Mary Ellen, but everyone calls me M.E. (you should too if you want to keep your head), and I am 14 years old. You asked me to write an essay about my family because it is May and I only just came to this school. I think you thought it would be an easy A. Well I've got news for you, anonymous teacher. My family is complicated.

I should start with my parents I suppose. I don't have a mother, I have two dads. One of them is Dean Winchester, the most badass hunter who has one of the coolest jobs you could hope for. He hunts monsters. My other dad is Castiel. He's an angel. Yes, the heavenly kind. He calls himself Castiel Novak because his vessel's last name is Novak.

Then there are my older siblings, Claire and Ben. Claire is 7 years older than me. She's the daughter of Cas's vessel and Amelia Novak, so I guess that makes her his biological daughter? I don't know, it's confusing. She's dating a woman named Meg Masters, who used to be a demon. Ben is Dean's son with a total bitch not so nice woman named Lisa Braeden. Lisa gave Ben to Dean the second he was born and then took off and never came back. Ben is 3 years older than me, and he has a girlfriend named Meredith who I hate. There's something off about her, but I can't put my finger on what it is.

We all live in the Men of Letters bunker in a big house in Kansas with my uncles, Sam and Gabe Winchester, and my three cousins. Uncle Sam is Dean's younger brother by 4 years, and Uncle Gabriel is Cas's older brother by probably 1000 years or so. He's an angel too. Actually, he's an archangel. My Uncle Gabriel is the guy who told the Virgin Mary that she was going to pop out a God-baby on Christmas.

Sam and Gabe have three kids – Cecy, Andy, and Johnny. Cecelia and Andy are 17 like Ben. They're twins – Cecy is older by 5 minutes. John Adam Winchester is named after my Grandpa John (Sam and Dean's father, killed by the demon Azazel) and my Uncle Adam (Sam and Dean's half-brother, trapped in Hell with the devil, literally). He's a trickster, a 4-year-old with magical powers. He eats a lot of candy and causes a lot of trouble.

I also have tons of family members who aren't actually related to us. I never met most of them, because they died before I was born. There's Uncle Bobby, Aunt Ellen, Aunt Jo, Uncle benny, Uncle Balthazar, and Aunt Anna to name a few.

I have met some of them of course. Aunt Jody is a sheriff in South-Dakota first and a hunter second, who always comes to our birthday parties. Aunt Charlie is a LARPer, the Queen of Moondoor to be exact. She's married to Aunt Dorothy, who is the Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz books by L. Frank Baum. Aunt Charlie and Aunt Dorothy have a daughter who's ten, too. They live in Oklahoma and vacation in Oz every summer. Uncle Kevin lives in the bunker house with us too. He's really smart. I wish he would homeschool me so I didn't have to go to a new school every two weeks. Oh, and there's my best friend back in Kansas, Maxine Lightwood-Bane the Shadowhunter, and her family. Johnny and her brother Raphael are best friends.

So, that's my family essay. You probably won't believe a word of it, or you'll just turn up your nose at it. You don't know how many homophobic teachers I've had who flunked me because my parents are gay. I'll probably fail the assignment. But hey, it's the truth. Go ahead and put a big fat F on there, I don't care. It wouldn't be the first time.

No one ever believes me. They all think I'm crazy.

Maybe you'll be different. Or maybe not.

Oh, I forgot to mention Crowley. He's the King of Hell. We keep him chained up in the basement so he can't kill us all. He likes poetry and torturing people.

We also have a dog.


End file.
